I begin today, 31 Dec 2008 with a very mellow and sad feeling. Another year has passed without the answer of our prayer. Looking back, 2008 filled with many sadness.
She'd be born two weeks from now.
There's a family of friend staying at our house. They have a beautiful and smart little daughter. My heart aches everytime she makes me laugh.
O God, now i knew too sure that You're not the one to blame.
I don't know what and who to blame.
It's not You, it's not me, it's not even Adam the first man.
The best thing that i could do right now, despite all the hurts and the sadness, is still hoping to You.
Hoping that the same time next year, we will hold our own children.
For You are the source to our every hope.
Wednesday 31 December 2008
Saturday 13 December 2008
The Promise That Came Through Faith
We were having Galatians 3 for our Daily Bread, which talk about how the believers now are living by faith and not by working of the Law. The passage also connecting on how the believers-by faith are also the heirs and be called Abraham's seed, therefore also eligible for the blessings God gave to Abraham;
9) So then, those who are people of faith are blessed and made happy and favored by God [as partners in fellowship] with the believing and trusting Abraham. (Galatians 3:9, English Amplified Bible)
Isn't it amazing. A God of the universe, decides to favor us, to blessed us, and our happines is important for Him.
I remember the time when i lost my cell-phone on the nigth train to Berlin. It was really my mistake, i was too sleepy when the cell phone fell to the bed under my bed so i decided to search it after we all woke up. Never had i in mind that the man who slept under my bed was so interested to my simple cell. Well, to cut story short, the man got out before dawn and took that thing. At that time i was just being reveiled of how bad things never came from God, that bad things came because of evil works and because the world is indeed a fallen world.
For the first time in my life, i didn't blame God of what's happening. I kindda shocked of the man's behaviour, but then i pitied him. He lost his sleeping hour, which he paid a lot of money by buying a sleeper bed only to get a uncomplete cell-phone without battery charge and all.
I prayed; "God, i know You didn't intend this to happen to me. But if You allowed this thing happen i believe Your hand keep protecting me and Irwan, and i believe whatever anybody took from us You'll restore that thing back. For i know that everything i have right now is from You."
Then the thought of having to buy another cell phone made my mind went a bit weary. I thought of how could God gave us extra money to buy a cell phone, my husband is an employee not a business man. His salary is fixed. Sometimes i'm just so cheap, ;p
Couplla of days later we went home in Paris, a friend gave us TWO cell phones of which i could pick one. Means, i don't have to buy another cell. Praise God for good friends! And... at the end of the month, out of our expectation we received a cheque with some amount of money. The amount is exactly enough to buy two brand new cell phones.
I repented, and said "God, You're always true to what You've said. You are indeed taking care of us and restore our situation. Praise be to You!"
9) So then, those who are people of faith are blessed and made happy and favored by God [as partners in fellowship] with the believing and trusting Abraham. (Galatians 3:9, English Amplified Bible)
Isn't it amazing. A God of the universe, decides to favor us, to blessed us, and our happines is important for Him.
I remember the time when i lost my cell-phone on the nigth train to Berlin. It was really my mistake, i was too sleepy when the cell phone fell to the bed under my bed so i decided to search it after we all woke up. Never had i in mind that the man who slept under my bed was so interested to my simple cell. Well, to cut story short, the man got out before dawn and took that thing. At that time i was just being reveiled of how bad things never came from God, that bad things came because of evil works and because the world is indeed a fallen world.
For the first time in my life, i didn't blame God of what's happening. I kindda shocked of the man's behaviour, but then i pitied him. He lost his sleeping hour, which he paid a lot of money by buying a sleeper bed only to get a uncomplete cell-phone without battery charge and all.
I prayed; "God, i know You didn't intend this to happen to me. But if You allowed this thing happen i believe Your hand keep protecting me and Irwan, and i believe whatever anybody took from us You'll restore that thing back. For i know that everything i have right now is from You."
Then the thought of having to buy another cell phone made my mind went a bit weary. I thought of how could God gave us extra money to buy a cell phone, my husband is an employee not a business man. His salary is fixed. Sometimes i'm just so cheap, ;p
Couplla of days later we went home in Paris, a friend gave us TWO cell phones of which i could pick one. Means, i don't have to buy another cell. Praise God for good friends! And... at the end of the month, out of our expectation we received a cheque with some amount of money. The amount is exactly enough to buy two brand new cell phones.
I repented, and said "God, You're always true to what You've said. You are indeed taking care of us and restore our situation. Praise be to You!"
Wednesday 10 December 2008
The Quest
Once a dear friend, who also struggle to have a child asked me. How do we know that God wants us to have children?
I went looking in the Bible and find these verses (thankyou Lord for the internet and biblestudytools.com!). I use the keyword "fruitful", and guess what i found? There are so many words from God contain the word "fruitful".
This is the word Lord gave to Adam and Eve before they fall into sin;
28 God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground." (Gen 1:28)
A note to considere here, God comand the living creatures and birds on earth to be fruitfull and increase in number also (Gen 1:22). The different was for men, God command them to rule over the fish and every living creatures.
After the fall, the world became so wicked that God sent flood and only saved Noah and his family. Still, God command Noah and his family this:
Then God blessed Noah and his sons, saying to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the earth. (Gen 9:1)
We can see that God's word for men to multiply remains the same, before and after the fall.
I then found the famous covenant God made with Abraham;
4 "As for me, this is my covenant with you: You will be the father of many nations. 5 No longer will you be called Abram; your name will be Abraham, for I have made you a father of many nations. 6 I will make you very fruitful; I will make nations of you, and kings will come from you. (Gen 17:6)
Even for Ishmael, Abraham's son from his concubine, God said:
And as for Ishmael, I have heard you: I will surely bless him; I will make him fruitful and will greatly increase his numbers. He will be the father of twelve rulers, and I will make him into a great nation.(Gen 17:20)
For Jacob, his son, Isaac give him blessings and said:
3 May God Almighty bless you and make you fruitful and increase your numbers until you become a community of peoples. (Gen 28:3)
Which then God confirmed to Jacob by blessing him with the same thing:
11 And God said to him, "I am God Almighty; be fruitful and increase in number. A nation and a community of nations will come from you, and kings will come from your body.(Gen 35:11)
Jacob then repeat God's blessing for him to Joseph to reminded him of God's promises for their descendants in Gen 48:4. After that the bible told us that the descendants of Joseph in Egypt indeed fruitful and increasingt:
Now the Israelites settled in Egypt in the region of Goshen. They acquired property there and were fruitful and increased greatly in number. (Gen 47:27)
At the end of his life, Jacob told Joseph of the blessings that God had promised them :
because of your father's God, who helps you, because of the Almighty, who blesses you with blessings of the heavens above, blessings of the deep that lies below, blessings of the breast and womb (gen 49:25)
God had definitely fulfil His promise to Jacob. Even to the point that made the Egyptian worried.
But the Israelites were fruitful and multiplied greatly and became exceedingly numerous, so that the land was filled with them. (Ex 1:7)
After the exodus from Egypt, God sent down the 10 comandments to the Israelites through Moses and He promised that if the Israelites follow His decrees and are careful to obey His commands, He promised them prosperity (Lev 26:4-5), security (verse 6-8), children (Lev 26:9, Deut 7:14, Deut 28:4) and a good relationship with Him (verse 11-13).
9 "'I will look on you with favor and make you fruitful and increase your numbers, and I will keep my covenant with you. (Leviticus 26:9)
14 You will be blessed more than any other people; none of your men or women will be childless, nor any of your livestock without young.
4 The fruit of your womb will be blessed, and the crops of your land and the young of your livestock--the calves of your herds and the lambs of your flocks. (Deut 28:4)
In Psalm 105:24, David said that it is God who makes His people grew in number.
24 The Lord made his people very fruitful; he made them too numerous for their foes. (Psalm 105:24)
To the Israelites on their land of captivity in Babylon, the Lord have mercy on them and promised to bring them back to their promised land, and bless them with children and prosperity.
11 I will increase the number of men and animals upon you, and they will be fruitful and become numerous. I will settle people on you as in the past and will make you prosper more than before. Then you will know that I am the Lord.(Ezekiel 36:11).
And before the new covenant begins, in the book of Maleachi there's an interesting verse that stated what is God intention from the unity of a man and a woman.
Has not the Lord made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. (Mal 2:15)
Oh la la... it is because God seeks godly offspring from them!
After i studied those verses, i'm convinced that God always included children, the fruit of the womb as one of His important blessings for His people. But wait a minute.... my mind wondered, those were the promises for the Israelites, the sons of Abraham, Jacob and Isaac. Were those promises also belongs to us?
Et voila... i've lost count of how many verses in new Testament trying to convinced us that we the believers of Christ are also the descendants of Abraham by faith.
And he received the sign of circumcision, a seal of the righteousness that he had by faith while he was still uncircumcised. So then, he is the father of all who believe but have not been circumcised, in order that righteousness might be credited to them (Romans 4:12)
7 Understand, then, that those who believe are children of Abraham. (Galatians 3:7)
14 He redeemed us in order that the blessing given to Abraham might come to the Gentiles through Christ Jesus, so that by faith we might receive the promise of the Spirit. (Galatians 3:14)
28 There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. 29 If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise. (Galatians 3:29)
And, since we are Abraham's seed through Jesus, are the promises of God belong to us? The answer come from this verse;
20 For no matter how many promises God has made, they are "Yes" in Christ. And so through him the "Amen" is spoken by us to the glory of God. (2 Corinthians 1:20)
Amen.
I went looking in the Bible and find these verses (thankyou Lord for the internet and biblestudytools.com!). I use the keyword "fruitful", and guess what i found? There are so many words from God contain the word "fruitful".
This is the word Lord gave to Adam and Eve before they fall into sin;
28 God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground." (Gen 1:28)
A note to considere here, God comand the living creatures and birds on earth to be fruitfull and increase in number also (Gen 1:22). The different was for men, God command them to rule over the fish and every living creatures.
After the fall, the world became so wicked that God sent flood and only saved Noah and his family. Still, God command Noah and his family this:
Then God blessed Noah and his sons, saying to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the earth. (Gen 9:1)
We can see that God's word for men to multiply remains the same, before and after the fall.
I then found the famous covenant God made with Abraham;
4 "As for me, this is my covenant with you: You will be the father of many nations. 5 No longer will you be called Abram; your name will be Abraham, for I have made you a father of many nations. 6 I will make you very fruitful; I will make nations of you, and kings will come from you. (Gen 17:6)
Even for Ishmael, Abraham's son from his concubine, God said:
And as for Ishmael, I have heard you: I will surely bless him; I will make him fruitful and will greatly increase his numbers. He will be the father of twelve rulers, and I will make him into a great nation.(Gen 17:20)
For Jacob, his son, Isaac give him blessings and said:
3 May God Almighty bless you and make you fruitful and increase your numbers until you become a community of peoples. (Gen 28:3)
Which then God confirmed to Jacob by blessing him with the same thing:
11 And God said to him, "I am God Almighty; be fruitful and increase in number. A nation and a community of nations will come from you, and kings will come from your body.(Gen 35:11)
Jacob then repeat God's blessing for him to Joseph to reminded him of God's promises for their descendants in Gen 48:4. After that the bible told us that the descendants of Joseph in Egypt indeed fruitful and increasingt:
Now the Israelites settled in Egypt in the region of Goshen. They acquired property there and were fruitful and increased greatly in number. (Gen 47:27)
At the end of his life, Jacob told Joseph of the blessings that God had promised them :
because of your father's God, who helps you, because of the Almighty, who blesses you with blessings of the heavens above, blessings of the deep that lies below, blessings of the breast and womb (gen 49:25)
God had definitely fulfil His promise to Jacob. Even to the point that made the Egyptian worried.
But the Israelites were fruitful and multiplied greatly and became exceedingly numerous, so that the land was filled with them. (Ex 1:7)
After the exodus from Egypt, God sent down the 10 comandments to the Israelites through Moses and He promised that if the Israelites follow His decrees and are careful to obey His commands, He promised them prosperity (Lev 26:4-5), security (verse 6-8), children (Lev 26:9, Deut 7:14, Deut 28:4) and a good relationship with Him (verse 11-13).
9 "'I will look on you with favor and make you fruitful and increase your numbers, and I will keep my covenant with you. (Leviticus 26:9)
14 You will be blessed more than any other people; none of your men or women will be childless, nor any of your livestock without young.
4 The fruit of your womb will be blessed, and the crops of your land and the young of your livestock--the calves of your herds and the lambs of your flocks. (Deut 28:4)
In Psalm 105:24, David said that it is God who makes His people grew in number.
24 The Lord made his people very fruitful; he made them too numerous for their foes. (Psalm 105:24)
Salomo, then said that everyone who fears the Lord will blessed and fruitful.
3 Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your sons will be like olive shoots around your table. (Psalm 128:3)
Through the prophet Jeremiah, along with the promise of the Branch of David, the King of Righteousness that will come, the Lord also promise this to the Israelites:
3 "I myself will gather the remnant of my flock out of all the countries where I have driven them and will bring them back to their pasture, where they will be fruitful and increase in number. (Jeremiah 23:3)
To the Israelites on their land of captivity in Babylon, the Lord have mercy on them and promised to bring them back to their promised land, and bless them with children and prosperity.
11 I will increase the number of men and animals upon you, and they will be fruitful and become numerous. I will settle people on you as in the past and will make you prosper more than before. Then you will know that I am the Lord.(Ezekiel 36:11).
And before the new covenant begins, in the book of Maleachi there's an interesting verse that stated what is God intention from the unity of a man and a woman.
Has not the Lord made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. (Mal 2:15)
Oh la la... it is because God seeks godly offspring from them!
After i studied those verses, i'm convinced that God always included children, the fruit of the womb as one of His important blessings for His people. But wait a minute.... my mind wondered, those were the promises for the Israelites, the sons of Abraham, Jacob and Isaac. Were those promises also belongs to us?
Et voila... i've lost count of how many verses in new Testament trying to convinced us that we the believers of Christ are also the descendants of Abraham by faith.
And he received the sign of circumcision, a seal of the righteousness that he had by faith while he was still uncircumcised. So then, he is the father of all who believe but have not been circumcised, in order that righteousness might be credited to them (Romans 4:12)
7 Understand, then, that those who believe are children of Abraham. (Galatians 3:7)
14 He redeemed us in order that the blessing given to Abraham might come to the Gentiles through Christ Jesus, so that by faith we might receive the promise of the Spirit. (Galatians 3:14)
28 There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. 29 If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise. (Galatians 3:29)
And, since we are Abraham's seed through Jesus, are the promises of God belong to us? The answer come from this verse;
20 For no matter how many promises God has made, they are "Yes" in Christ. And so through him the "Amen" is spoken by us to the glory of God. (2 Corinthians 1:20)
Amen.
Tuesday 9 December 2008
How To Earn Grace
It's december and christmas is coming!
I remember back then when i was in highschool, december would be the busiest time of the year. I'd spent so many hours doing rehearsal for Christmas party, having meetings to arrange things, not to mention attending many invitations from other schools and institutions. When other teenagers were spending their saturday nights dating with their girlfriend/boyfriend, i'd spent it having meetings and worship gatherings. At that time, i too wanted to date like normal girl, but i always wanted a relationship that last until marriage, and since it's only gonna happen years ahead, i took my time and focused on my service. Although i can't really tell was that the real reason i wasn't dating or just my defense mechanism. HAH!
And then in my university years, still serving Him. I spent my times arranging many revivals, being a leader of bible study, studying, analyzing bible with bible scholars until my mind was filled with many doctrines, interpretations, exegeises. I felt full of the knowledge of Him, at the point that i could sense a wrong teaching being preached, and judge the preacher!!! Nevertheless, I was enjoying my time, and i sense His blessing all over my life.
I thought i was doing well, rather succesfully -if you know what i mean- all the requirements that the Bible told me to do for being a good Christian. And then the time come when i realize that God has not given me the one blessing that me and my husband wanted so much. I keep wondering why and why. I looked at some people around me, and having known them for quite long, i realized that they're not as succesful as i am in pleasing God with their past (-as in i thought i was-). But why in the world that they have the blessing that i want so easy? So effortlessly?
I compare my life with them, how i never did this sin nor did that sin, it is supposed to be me who get those blessings. It supposed to be me, me and ME. Once, i said to God that i was sorry i served Him. I wished i spent my teenagers doing bad things, having pre-marital sex before marriage, taking drugs and all, because it seems that He didn't care of what good i have done in my life.
Until the lowest point of my life came, and i thought i'd gone mad. I was mad why He allowed this thing to happen for people like me. I mean, yeah, me... the faithful child?. Then i thought was i that faithful? Weren't there many times i failed, weren't there were many times i avoid serving Him? What about that particular time when i was deliberately hurting someone's feeling? The thought of my wrong doings came like a river into my head until i felt so tired, i told God, "I've failed. I've nothing to boast about. You're right, i don't deserve any good things in life".
At that time i felt that He was so far away. Someone so unreachable, unable to be understood. When i heard a preacher said that we are the beloved children of God, my heart laugh cynically. Who are those lucky ones, i thought. And the preacher speak of the verse in romans 8:1 Therefore, there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. This verse spoke in my heart and mind like a martyl being slapped into a brickwall. I know i am in Christ, then there is no condemnation for me.
Then why should i think endlessly about my wrongdoings? Or even worst, why should i condemned people for their wrong doings? He has been punished for my sins and their sins, it is by His grace we are free from all condemnations.
8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-- 9 not by works, so that no one can boast. (Ephesians 2:4-5, NIV)
I always thought that i'm better from many people, because i've do righteous things. But i realized that even if i did many wrongdoings, those sins are also has been paid by Jesus blood. It's by grace i'm saved, not by my works.
That brings me to conclusion; me who (i thought) has a past with flying colors, and people (who i thought) passed theirs with many red marks, we all have the same position before God. Whether we did less or we did more, it's all been paid up in the cross. So now, if everyone in Christ receive the same righteousness through faith (Romans 3:22) how could i make judgement which of us merit this blessings or that blessings? I forgot that the reason why i am able to avoid doing sins is also because of His unmerited providence. Without His power, i'd fall here and there.
Now i know exactly how the pharisees felt when they saw Jesus bless and heals all the sinners, prostitutes, tax collector and all. Those pharisess were jealous and bitter. I was like one of those pharisees, i too jealous and bitter when i saw "undeserved" people being blessed. I count so much on my own efforts, that i become self-righteous. I forget what grace really means. It's simply an undeserved and unmerited favor from God.
If i want more of His grace in my life, i should be an undeservee. Knowing that i deserved nothing, but only through Jesus, i could depend faithfully on His mercy and kindness.
I remember back then when i was in highschool, december would be the busiest time of the year. I'd spent so many hours doing rehearsal for Christmas party, having meetings to arrange things, not to mention attending many invitations from other schools and institutions. When other teenagers were spending their saturday nights dating with their girlfriend/boyfriend, i'd spent it having meetings and worship gatherings. At that time, i too wanted to date like normal girl, but i always wanted a relationship that last until marriage, and since it's only gonna happen years ahead, i took my time and focused on my service. Although i can't really tell was that the real reason i wasn't dating or just my defense mechanism. HAH!
And then in my university years, still serving Him. I spent my times arranging many revivals, being a leader of bible study, studying, analyzing bible with bible scholars until my mind was filled with many doctrines, interpretations, exegeises. I felt full of the knowledge of Him, at the point that i could sense a wrong teaching being preached, and judge the preacher!!! Nevertheless, I was enjoying my time, and i sense His blessing all over my life.
I thought i was doing well, rather succesfully -if you know what i mean- all the requirements that the Bible told me to do for being a good Christian. And then the time come when i realize that God has not given me the one blessing that me and my husband wanted so much. I keep wondering why and why. I looked at some people around me, and having known them for quite long, i realized that they're not as succesful as i am in pleasing God with their past (-as in i thought i was-). But why in the world that they have the blessing that i want so easy? So effortlessly?
I compare my life with them, how i never did this sin nor did that sin, it is supposed to be me who get those blessings. It supposed to be me, me and ME. Once, i said to God that i was sorry i served Him. I wished i spent my teenagers doing bad things, having pre-marital sex before marriage, taking drugs and all, because it seems that He didn't care of what good i have done in my life.
Until the lowest point of my life came, and i thought i'd gone mad. I was mad why He allowed this thing to happen for people like me. I mean, yeah, me... the faithful child?. Then i thought was i that faithful? Weren't there many times i failed, weren't there were many times i avoid serving Him? What about that particular time when i was deliberately hurting someone's feeling? The thought of my wrong doings came like a river into my head until i felt so tired, i told God, "I've failed. I've nothing to boast about. You're right, i don't deserve any good things in life".
At that time i felt that He was so far away. Someone so unreachable, unable to be understood. When i heard a preacher said that we are the beloved children of God, my heart laugh cynically. Who are those lucky ones, i thought. And the preacher speak of the verse in romans 8:1 Therefore, there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. This verse spoke in my heart and mind like a martyl being slapped into a brickwall. I know i am in Christ, then there is no condemnation for me.
Then why should i think endlessly about my wrongdoings? Or even worst, why should i condemned people for their wrong doings? He has been punished for my sins and their sins, it is by His grace we are free from all condemnations.
8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-- 9 not by works, so that no one can boast. (Ephesians 2:4-5, NIV)
I always thought that i'm better from many people, because i've do righteous things. But i realized that even if i did many wrongdoings, those sins are also has been paid by Jesus blood. It's by grace i'm saved, not by my works.
That brings me to conclusion; me who (i thought) has a past with flying colors, and people (who i thought) passed theirs with many red marks, we all have the same position before God. Whether we did less or we did more, it's all been paid up in the cross. So now, if everyone in Christ receive the same righteousness through faith (Romans 3:22) how could i make judgement which of us merit this blessings or that blessings? I forgot that the reason why i am able to avoid doing sins is also because of His unmerited providence. Without His power, i'd fall here and there.
Now i know exactly how the pharisees felt when they saw Jesus bless and heals all the sinners, prostitutes, tax collector and all. Those pharisess were jealous and bitter. I was like one of those pharisees, i too jealous and bitter when i saw "undeserved" people being blessed. I count so much on my own efforts, that i become self-righteous. I forget what grace really means. It's simply an undeserved and unmerited favor from God.
If i want more of His grace in my life, i should be an undeservee. Knowing that i deserved nothing, but only through Jesus, i could depend faithfully on His mercy and kindness.
Monday 8 December 2008
The Most Effective Way
At the church last week our preacher spoke about loyalty to God. And as usual, me and my husband discussed the topic at lunch. We had a little bit disagreement on how we put emphasis on the word "discipline". I was a bit harshed at him, maybe because i hate that word. For years i've discipled myself (i thought) and yet i never felt succeed. Looking back to those years, i was in an "in-and-out" relationship with God because of my failure of keeping the discipline.
For me, the discipline to keep our loyalty to God is not an answer. The answer is always Jesus. Sounds cliche?
Let's make an example, someone was sleeping late and was watching TV. And if by a chance, she/he lives in a country like French, even before midnight there are many channels with x-rated category movie everywhere she/he turns. I believe as a Christian, watching such things would make us fall into the sin of adultery. Not only that it will bring a desease called pornography addiction, it will effect her/his relationship with her/his spouse. Agree?
The question is, what makes her/him change the channel and refuses to continue watching? Is it by:
a. reminding her/him that it is a sin to watched those movies.
b. reminding her/him that whatever she/he do next, even if she/he watch the movie and enjoy it, this particular sin has already redeemed by Christ.
For me, the realization of "b" never fails to bring shivers in my hearth and tears in my eyes.
I couldn't do it, not because i knew i'd commited a sin, but because i knew that even if i failed and do the thing, it is already forgiven by God through the work of Jesus in calvary. And when i'm thinking about the love of Jesus for me, oh man... it is the easiest thing to turn off the TV (i mean, if i were that guy -lol-).
It's the easiest thing to listen to someone tells story about herself for hours, it's the easiest thing to comfort somebody and not thinking about our own problem, it's the easiest thing to do whatever i had to do in church or everywhere.
Why is it that easy? Just by knowing that even if i failed, even if i didn't do the thing, there's no condemnation for me. Jesus has already accomplished any punishements for me. And in the eye of our Heavenly Father, i'm always righteous.
For me, i believe it is not discipline who brings people to avoid sin, it's the "knowing" of the Truth. And the Truth will set us free.
For me, the discipline to keep our loyalty to God is not an answer. The answer is always Jesus. Sounds cliche?
Let's make an example, someone was sleeping late and was watching TV. And if by a chance, she/he lives in a country like French, even before midnight there are many channels with x-rated category movie everywhere she/he turns. I believe as a Christian, watching such things would make us fall into the sin of adultery. Not only that it will bring a desease called pornography addiction, it will effect her/his relationship with her/his spouse. Agree?
The question is, what makes her/him change the channel and refuses to continue watching? Is it by:
a. reminding her/him that it is a sin to watched those movies.
b. reminding her/him that whatever she/he do next, even if she/he watch the movie and enjoy it, this particular sin has already redeemed by Christ.
For me, the realization of "b" never fails to bring shivers in my hearth and tears in my eyes.
I couldn't do it, not because i knew i'd commited a sin, but because i knew that even if i failed and do the thing, it is already forgiven by God through the work of Jesus in calvary. And when i'm thinking about the love of Jesus for me, oh man... it is the easiest thing to turn off the TV (i mean, if i were that guy -lol-).
It's the easiest thing to listen to someone tells story about herself for hours, it's the easiest thing to comfort somebody and not thinking about our own problem, it's the easiest thing to do whatever i had to do in church or everywhere.
Why is it that easy? Just by knowing that even if i failed, even if i didn't do the thing, there's no condemnation for me. Jesus has already accomplished any punishements for me. And in the eye of our Heavenly Father, i'm always righteous.
For me, i believe it is not discipline who brings people to avoid sin, it's the "knowing" of the Truth. And the Truth will set us free.
Sunday 7 December 2008
New Blog
I decided to make a new blog beside my two other previous blogs. In here i'd write more of the continuos journey of me redefining my faith and my knowledge of Jesus, the Saviour of my life.
I accepted Him as my Saviour when i was in highschool. I fell in love with Him and serve Him since. All through my highschool years, and then my university years, it is my joy to give my time, my best effort and my love for Him. Yet i always felt i'm a failure who never do good enough. I search more of Him through many books, doctrines, teachings and philosophies, but those knowledge only made me accused and judged people more. Inside, i'm still burdened by the toughts of not being "good enough".
At my thirthy years of age, i almost loose my faith when i miscarriage our first baby. But when we walked in that "valley of death", of bitterness and sadness of loosing our baby, He decided to open our eyes radically to the truth about His grace. A deeper meaning of what Jesus did in calvary for us. He opens our eyes of who He really is. Of the lenght, the width, the heigth and the deep Jesus's love for us. Isn't if strange, that we realized how much He loves us throught the most painful event of our lives?
It is not about how good i am before Him. I know, that throught Christ i am always "that good". The challenge right now is not about my performance, it's about believing.
I do believe in you my Lord.
You are my Saviour.
You are the God of restoration, and i know, our restoration has already begun!.
I accepted Him as my Saviour when i was in highschool. I fell in love with Him and serve Him since. All through my highschool years, and then my university years, it is my joy to give my time, my best effort and my love for Him. Yet i always felt i'm a failure who never do good enough. I search more of Him through many books, doctrines, teachings and philosophies, but those knowledge only made me accused and judged people more. Inside, i'm still burdened by the toughts of not being "good enough".
At my thirthy years of age, i almost loose my faith when i miscarriage our first baby. But when we walked in that "valley of death", of bitterness and sadness of loosing our baby, He decided to open our eyes radically to the truth about His grace. A deeper meaning of what Jesus did in calvary for us. He opens our eyes of who He really is. Of the lenght, the width, the heigth and the deep Jesus's love for us. Isn't if strange, that we realized how much He loves us throught the most painful event of our lives?
It is not about how good i am before Him. I know, that throught Christ i am always "that good". The challenge right now is not about my performance, it's about believing.
I do believe in you my Lord.
You are my Saviour.
You are the God of restoration, and i know, our restoration has already begun!.
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